know love and when to accept love
the funny thing about love is that if was never there in the first place it probably wont ever be there. i think i said that when i was 13? 14? and i still find it to be true to this day to a certain extent. i do believe that you can not make someone love you, to quote myself, “it has to be internal for them”. but love to me is a funny thing to explain, very very funny because its definition is so vernacular. so, i’ll answer this in the quickest and most valid way i know how. when i was at my aunties house my, i think it was my 11 year old cousin asked me “how do you know you love someone?” and i remember being stuck, and i said, “hmm, well, the easiest way i can think to explain it is, you know you love someone when the things youd do for your family you’d do for them without having to think about it.” and he said, “ohhhhhhh, okay.” and then my best friend’s boy friend asked me he said, “kyra, what is love to you?” and i said, “i’ll tel you the same thing i told my cousin, you love someone when the things you’d sacrifice for your family, you’d sacrifice for them, when you dont have to think of going without for that person because you just can.” and i know its a very simple definition but i think its a good one. sacrifice is alot. this is a very existential idea but humans at our nature are…..independent. we know how to do for ourselves and make sure we survive. we make sure we have enough. enough, not an abundance. because in nature having an abundance of something slows you down. you pack light, you take what you need. so if you only have but for so much you’re not going to give a whole lot. it is said that man, being humans, sacrifice for no one and the only exceptions are his children. what im getting at is that its a whole lot to say i wont eat so that you can or we have three pieces of fish, i’ll let you have two and i’ll just eat one because you need it more than i do. when you find someone who will go without so that you have, and most importantly not look to cash in any favors and wants absolutely nothing in return but for you to just HEAR them and love them. to just hold them when they are afraid or cold or lonely, keep them. because people these days want too much out of love. you never hear about relationships lasting anymore because that “i got you babe” love doesnt exist anymore, we as a people have too many superflous “needs”. we dont know how to do without. robin thicke said, “you can be rich when you’re poor and poor when you’re rich.” having “everything” isnt everything. the most important lesson in life is learning when someone has good intentions and when they dont. read people, their face, their body, their energy. watch and observe. dont just see, commit to memory. when you find people who want to help you just to help you accept it. when you find people who love you, let them love you. let them take down your walls with you. if you find someone who can understand the concept of progression over perfection than grow with them. let them take down your walls and then you love them. fight with them, not against them. be a team. its a rare thing to love and be loved back so dont fight for someone who can only understand your value once everyone else already has. and dont look back. you do not deserve me at my best. but more than that know that i deserve someone who deserves me, someone who LOVES me.